Garden Gigglers Gifts

'It's my first attempt at gardening but so far I've learned...'

"Honest Dad, I was going to mow the lawn... But I can't find the lawnmower in here!"

"For crying out loud, Adam, put this on before you catch a cold."

'Oh yeah? Well I'm not crazy about your humming, either!'

'It's one of your five a day.'

"I dunno. Have you been watering them?"

"I hate vegetables."

The Busy Gardener

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

Hardy Annuals

"Garden variety allergies."

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

"Hello Mr Flower. You've got a pretty face. But your feet are filthy."

Yard Sale

Beginning Yarder.

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

"Perhaps more people would give heed unto the word of the Lord if the Lord had a funny blog."

Extremely Practical Jokes.

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"What are you in for?"

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

'...and this is the water garden...'

Garden of Eden and scrumping

"It said on the packet the pasta should act as a vehicle for the sauce."

'Where are you going?'

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

Balding gnomes