Garbage Whisperer Gifts

"You're early - trash day's not till thursday."

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

His New Grillfriend

Award Winning Gardener

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

I want to make this company green the old fashion way...

'F-E-E-D-T-H-E-D-O-G . . . Hey that's spooky! Why would your granddad say that?'

"Really? That's the only game in this house?"

'Hey, are you like me? Do you hate mowing around trees? ell, then THIS is the machine for you!'

Summer in Elysium and The long vacation in Arcadia

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

"I'm feeling somewhat optimistic. Let's get perennials."

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

"I'll check and see if he's available."

'If all goes according to plan, this garden should reach crisis proportions by midsummer.'

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

Two 'superheros' show the discrepancy in toilet paper production.

"Ok, you were right – dogs can see ghosts."

"If obsessing about trash is wrong, then. . . I don't wanna be right."

Naughty grass, go to sleep! It's pasture bed time!

Beware of the Lawn

'God, quick! Give me the gift of the gab.'

"Please....wait...the...meeting...host...will....let you...in....soon."

"Ever killed a man?"

"You're on mute."

"This lawnmower is a real time saver. After pushing it around for an hour, I forget about all the ambitious landscaping plans I thought up over winter."

"Retirement was a culture shock, I still haven't mastered 'pottering'."

"I'm getting your dear, departed husband—he can't believe you paid forty-five dollars for this."

"Your wife says she's been watching you, and there are a lot of things you need to work on."

A psychic mows the lawn.

"Boy I love this garden, there are flowers everywhere: Not only is the lady a keen gardener, but she is retired now..."

Cemetery: Communicated with your loved one see Madam Zolta within.

'Ach, Herr Scrooge - ghost of this, ghost of that...serious delusions.'

"Joe, is that you? Can you really hear me? What's the password for the email?"