Garage Technician Gifts

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

"Having trouble stopping huh? Ah well, them's the brakes."

'Thanks for putting in a new engine... Pity you forgot to take out the old one.'

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"It would be easier to tell you what does work. It's your air freshener!"

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

'My electric car is giving me static!'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

Inflating Boobs.

CLEAR!

Organic Soldering.

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

"I've narrowed the problem down to somewhere under this big flap I discovered."

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

'No, don't tell me, your electric garage door is broken.'

'You got clowns in your engine. That's what's making them funny noises.'

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

"Because you're a mechanic, we're going to do your hydrotherapy in a car pool."

"I'd like my daughter to know something about engines."

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

Jenkins took special pride in his new invention, the rubberband-powered runabout.

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

Bob’s Museum

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"