Garage Mechanic Gifts

And could you put in a louder horn?'

'We've run all the tests, Doc, and can't find a thing wrong with it. It must b e psychological.'

'It's up for adoption. Just pay to have it fixed.'

'I need a really loud horn. My brakes are a bit spongy.'

'Bob, call you back. A big auto body job just drove in.'

'Yes, I did give it an oil change myself. I changed to a healthy low calorie oil with no transfats.'

"They don't build them like this any more. Heck, why would they?"

'M.O.T. certificate?!...a death certificate's the best I can do.'

'It starts up OK, then gets stuck in traffic.'

'We think of our estimates as merely a quest for the truth.'

'This will help us locate the source of that funny noise.'

'I understand you work on foreign models?'

'Before you say it's got some old parts, remember that you repaired it last time.'

Everything makes a noise except the hooter!

'Hey, pal -- We don't talk about the 'Car Guys' around here, okay?'

'The hamsters are just worn out.'

Thanks for putting in a new engine, pity you forgot to take the old one out.

Your electric garage door is broken?

'Mac works on cars strictly for his own amusement.'

'This is Green Peace! Throw out your refrigerant and come out with your hands up.'

It isn't the battery!

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

Mechanical problem? Not a problem!

Tires, Oil Changes, Dumb Bumper Stickers Removed.

Service and Repairs.

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

'We found the squeak in your car, Mr Disney.'

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

Mad Cyclist Disease, the latest problem to plague cyclists.

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

CLEAR!