Gamer Bot Gifts

Robotics. He's programmed to play video games all day long. Planned adolescence!

Mac OS 20

'I'm also fluent in Geek.'

"Wanna toss the ol' virtual pigskin?"

Nobody mourned Sir Dad-Joke.

Whistler's Great-Great-Great-Great-Great Grandson

What an afternoon. Rudy, listen to me. It didn't mean anything. You can't play Xbox 360 all afternoon with a guy and pretend it means nothing. I was drunk! You loved it - all of it. The racing and arcade games, the first-person shooters, but especially ... No ... WWF Wrestling Smackdown. I'm a married woman!

'Jeff is a tackle on his online college football team.'

"I'm bilingual. I can talk to parents and step parents."

"You think you have problems? My entire wing command was just destroyed."

'A boy at school was named after his father. They've called him Dad.'

Psychiatry. I got in touch with my inner child, and now I'm going broke buying video games!

The Robotics Department. It says here that these guys completely replace all the cells in their bodies every seven years! Wow! What a slow upgrade cycle! If we don't replace all our parts every six months we become obsolete! It makes you wonder why they're in charge! Yeah, like they expect us to remember thousands of gigabytes of data while they forget their passwords! (Published originally on April 19, 2006)

'I know I can't take it with me, but what about computer simulations?'

"I'm a High-tech mouse hunter.'

STRIP Hambone: Computer armageddon

'I agree. You should definitely increase your refresh rate!'

'I prefer to work vicariously as opposed to remotely.'

"That was before I found this amazing new way to earn $$$ working from home."

Thanksgiving Feast. Get lots of turkey, but not too much of you'll have to take a pause at the nap box. I'm skipping the cranberries and going for the green beans and the potatoes. I'm at the stuffing now and getting bonus points for extra gravy! Hey! There's a shortcut through the corn, straight to the pumpkin pie! I win! Not so fast. You missed the most important spot where you give thanks for your family and friends. Oh, you're right. It's okay that I didn't win. I'll get you tomor

"No, playing fantasy football doesn't count as exercise. No wonder you pulled a muscle getting up on the table."

"I virtually finished my homework."

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

"Hey, dad! How about I find a video game of this we can play together?"

'Pause your games, kids! There's a high fly ball deep to center field!'

'What does carpal tunnel syndrome feel like?'

1080P New Year's Resolution

"I reached Level Three of Super Mario Brothers!"

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"Guac-A-Mole"

The October 31 Committee

Don't Let Your Computer Eat You Up!

'His social skills have improved since he lost his job in banking.'

"My drone strikes are successful, Sir, but I keep getting trash talk from a 15 year old in Montana."

"Clinton spoke at my inauguration, and it's so cold outside-can he crash here for another week?"