Game Day Host Gifts

'It doesn't look like high definition TV to me either.'

"Ironically, this is the living room."

Church for sports worshipers.

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

Go team!

'How about a game of cards?'

Check your universal remote control at the door.

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

Some card-game puns

Perils of the double play.

'Let's give it five more minutes. If they haven't eased up on the lasers by then, we'll have to postpone the game.'

A man cheers

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

Everyone agrees: Aunt Juanita needs a man.

'Hey, hey, hey!'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'John is watching the game under protest.'

'We're drinking to our round of golf...one shot at a time.'

Pirate playing pool using his artificial leg as a pool stick.

American Football.

'Checkmate I think!'

Strive to win!

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

"Compromise? What the hell is there between safe and out?"