Galactic Joke Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Johnson, we'd better get the gun! I think there might be some really big rabbits living here!"

Save Our Universe

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

"You know that moon was passed a minute ago?..."

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

"Is there someone other than Trump I can speak to? I didn't come all this way to talk to an idiot!"

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

"Are there space-babes?"

". . . And how long have you felt alienated?"

'OK, who stuck that wedding confetti star on it?'

Black Hole Corks

How's my abducting?

'Maybe the Universe isn't expanding -- maybe it's just you.'

"Houston....I've found the 'Plank Constant'."

"Can you take over the controls? I've got to take a number 4!"

Chalk Bored

"I think we walked into the wrong bar."

'Deploy the Candarm and ready the Canafinger.'

"In space, there is no sound. Except those - we can still hear those @#%* things."

"I don't know what it is, but it's big and I'm putting it on ebay!"

"Feeling very much at home here, Houston."

Cola Observatory

"Hang on -- I'm going to make the jump to 90 m.p.h."