Gadget-free Enthusiast Gifts

"Well, it might interest you to know that 'running naked' means running without a watch or iphone."

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

Nerd tryouts.

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

Dawing your Cellphone

Bicycle sat nav.

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

"It takes a few days for them to detox from screens."

'E-books?'

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

"I had an Android, then I switched to an iPhone. Then I went back to an Android, then I switched back to the iPhone. . ."

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'When I said that I needed a new mouse...'

'I love this street...it's so real man...'

'Maybe a firewall isn't enough to protect our computer from worms and viruses. That's why I additionally installed this fence!'

'Since he bought the leaf blower I hardly ever see him.'

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

'Now where's my Tibbles got to?'

'Still no improvement? Nurse, attach more gizmos.'

'Throw in your iPad and you've got a deal.'

'Yes, technology has come a long way, but the baby won't have a touch screen.'

The secret lives of household things.

"People will pay anything to get away from it all. These babies don't even have WiFi on them."

'These new metal detectors are great!'

"Sorry, gotta go - I'm going to be late for my next meeting."

Desert wifi

"Pretty impressive for a product of a 3-D printer."

"That vulture just appeared and started picking at my phone. My battery must have died."

'I don't care if an app on your phone is monitoring you, you still need a baby sitter when your father and I are gone.'

"Frank, I need your help. The computers are down, but I was told you know how to multiply two numbers together."

"I as a multitasker, which lead to being a multiscreener."

'Now Gregory needed an investor to take his Gentlemen's Lavatory Tongs from dream to reality.'