Futuristic Pet Owner Gifts

Micro-chipped cat talks in binary.

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

A woman takes a pterodactyl on a run.

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

People and robots

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

"I wonder what he dreams about...Squirrels I bet."

"It's a bit of a surprise. He has eaten people before, but only when he felt threatened. Your husband must have provoked him."

"You're not a police dog, and that's not a crime scene."

Go to settings, sounds, ringtone, whistle, who can hear this, then tap only me.

Man and dog on their hover boards.

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.

'This won't take long, nurse. This is the dog that got my best friend last summer.'

"No more nuts and bolts for you!"

Cat reading Rommel biography.

"This horse comes with all the hardware necessary to be fully autonomous."

"Have you seen what goes into that stuff?"

"Tonight... Hemingway."

"My dog is a finicky eater. He refuses to eat my homework."

"Can you train him to bite my husband whenever the trash gets full?"

Dinosaur Pet Stores

Boy throws a stick for a tortoise. By the time the tortoise returns, the boy is an old man.

"Who wants to go for walkies?"

"He was a sea rescue."

101 uses of a dead cat: chariot wheels.

'Heel! HEEL! Bad potato!'

"Who's my good widdoo headless dog?"

'What! No garnish or side salad?'

"Better than a hunting dog - she sniffs out wifi hotspots."

'That's the worst case of fleas I've ever seen...!'

If you want full cover for your cat I suggest you take out the nine lives policy.

Do not allow your owner to foul the footpath.

"You're right, you DO smell like a wiener!"