Futuristic Families Gifts

"Right here is your baby’s infrastructure, and in a month or so we’ll be able to see the analytics."

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

'I'm here to fix your robotic milker.'

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

People and robots

Drone Baby Delivery

"Robot waiters are OK, but I just wish they wouldn't hover so."

'STOP! You're injecting the wrong GMO gene!'

"To be honest it's not char-grilled, it's actually hydrogen-fluoride lasered chicken."

'This computerized herd management is getting out of control.'

"Set phazers to medium rare!"

'Well Miss Pearson, this flood resistant GM Maize you've developed is pure genius. Giving it gills was a masterstroke'

Where steel wool comes from.

'I'm sorry, Jerome. Instead of marriage and having kids, I've decided just to have myself cloned.'

'Your wife gets custody of the children, and you get custody of the babysitter.'

'Mom, Kevin just asked me to live with him!'

'2085 AD: Nothing has changed much. Lovers still carve their initials in synthetic trees with laser pen knives.

'No, the woman of the house is at work. May I help you?'

Ok, I've set you up with an offshore back account, so you can hide your valuables for use after the oncoming apocalypse. You're too kind, sir. Where is it? Caymans? Switzerland? That's amateur stuff. The economy's increasingly global. When America goes down, it could take the Swiss and Cayman economies down with it. Then where – To open your account, I'll need your passport, tax returns, and a map of your genome. Bank of Deneb Prime. Trump turned me on to it.

Yup, I like these self-driving cattle. Google.

Remote control sheepdog

'Time to do your homework... Time to do your homework...'

"I'm strictly yes or no. Alexa and Siri deal with facts. Value judgements we leave to your mother."

Technology has changed a lot of things, including how kids run away from home.

Robot feeding Baby.

'Food? Do you think I'm the kind of mother that cooks?'

"We will take wal-mart, exxon mobil, chevron and then assimilate them. . . resistance is futile. . ."

"As a blended family, we've learned to set limits. I limit myself to margaritas and he limits himself to mojitos."

Cows of the Future!

'Typical family rubbish bin if you ask me: No chips, no chocolate, but lots of discarded vegetables...'

'We tried solar, we tried wind, and now we have a little nuclear reactor out back.'

'In vitro fertilization and sperm banks. I remember the old days when you couldn't outsource having kids.'

'This is iDiet, the fanziest restaurant in town. They've got virtual food only.'

"There, there, son, you know your mother and I are always here for you."