Future-seeing Family Gifts

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is none of us will be alive then.'

"I have an imaginary friend called Fred, and my dad has one called Alexa."

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

"We have the exact same taste."

"Oh, Frank, look! He's sending his first tweet!"

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

Lay-Z-Family Recliner

"Right here is your baby’s infrastructure, and in a month or so we’ll be able to see the analytics."

'Wendy! I'm glad you came over! I want you to see my baby's ultrasound hologram!'

Today, a special retro segment of The Fad Herald. It's the Fad Herald. Off the hook! Hey jive turkeys, here's what's not cool: Fossil fuels, dependence on Mideast oil, long gas lines. Here's what's groovy: Solar power, alternative fuels, energy independence. Can you dig? The world is changing, baby! Instead of solar panels, I'm buying a sweet 8-track player. Next week, a look ahead to 2040. What's out: Waiting in long lines to fill up the spacecraft with gas.

Paw readings

"Meeting old relatives...is like peeking into our future."

Olympic Climate

"I see a girl, I see a marriage, I see her not understanding you, I see a beer belly. Do you want me to go on?"

'But if you want the real lowdown, we'll need some of your DNA.'

"I see you, I see a vet, you're sore for weeks afterwards."

'It's Blurred.'

'We programmed it to simulate living conditions in the year 2000, and it's become hysterical.'

"Oh, it's you, I'm glad I picked up.You wouldn't believe how many annoying telepathicmarketing calls I get."

Virtual Beach

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

'I really don't know how you got here with your life line!'

'Congratulations, you've got the job. Unfortunately though, you'll be constantly late, and we'll fire you in two months.'

New World Order

'I see a beautiful young woman. You're naked, she's leaning over you. Oh, wait. She's performing your autopsy! '

'You see me coming here every week and paying you fifty dollars...'

'Mom, I need a push.'

"You don't want to know."

'Fortune telling/retirement planning'