Future Physician Gifts

'I can't read a word of this essay of yours. Excellent work.'

'A little professionalism, people. When asking a patient to undress, we do not giggle.'

Little doctor.

"Bad news, Dad—you're brain-dead!"

'Young man, haven't you ever heard of the hippocratic oath?'

The Medical Student

"Dad, I want to become a doctor. I already know something about anatomy: A human being consists of a head, a belly, legs, arms, and a smartphone."

'I'm not playing - I don't trust you!'

'An 'A' in penmanship. There goes my career as a doctor.'

Mom, you gotta raise my allowance. I can't afford my malpractice insurance!

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

Kid to kid: 'I can't come out to play. I'm watching the Golf Channel so I can grow up to be a doctor.'

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

Day one, medical shool: 'This is my elbow, this is my ass...'

"No, Dad, I'm not practicing to be a golfer when I grow up! I'm practicing to be a doctor!"

"I want to be a doctor, but they won't let me! It's discrimination!"

"If I make it into medical school it'll be as a cadaver!"

"You DO have health insurance, I assume!"

'Don't bite it.I have to check Daddy next.'

'Will you raise my allowance? I want to play doctor but can't afford the malpractice insurance.'

Young Dr. Dolittle.

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

Little Doctor meets Little Geneticists.

"Here...let me call an expert...someone who knows about these things."

"You always get to be the therapist! I never get to be the therapist!"

'Stop purring I can't hear your heart beat.'

"Gracie, what does a little girl like you wish for? I mean, besides being a doctor, a motivational speaker, a great parent and becoming president?"

"He wants to be a plastic surgeon when he grows up."

"My daughter tells me you want to become a doctor."

'The doctor will be with you shortly, he's finishing medical school.'

'Wilkins! Keep your eyes on your own cadaver!'

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

"You'll never make it as a doctor with handwriting like this. I understood every word."

"Before you grade my test, keep in mind, my dream is to become a wealthy doctor, just like my available father"

"That's enough about the noggin and the schnoz. Let's move on to the tummy-wummy and the keister."