Future Oscar Winner Gifts

"The first half of my life I waited for Hollywood to call. Now, ironically enough, I'm Hollywood and I can call people."

"Why are you playing out in your nativity play costume, son?"

'You're looking for someone to play the part of a washed-up, hammy actor?... Hold on, I have someone here who could've been born for the part.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

"When I grow up, I want to become president and eventually the subject of a groundbreaking, critically-acclaimed Broadway musical."

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

"Remember, kids, it's not winning that matters, it's getting a clean urine sample that's important."

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

'I have a feeling one day when he grows up he'll be an artist of some kind.'

Hello, this is Cable News. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. As you know, we only have four short years until the next presidential election. So it's time to start asking: Who should run? Whom do you prefer? (A) Al Gore … (B) John Kerry … (C) Marco Rubio … (D) Ted Cruz ... (E) Christ Christie ... House of Java Cybercafe. How about (F) You? Mr. Eugene Yu is actually (T).

The game is tied, and this is the final inning because the sun is setting. I understand, coach, I need to get home before dark!

"What do you want to be when you blow up?"

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'We'll send you to acting class when you're older. For now, get up and get ready for school.'

Aim for the Stars, Settle for an Asteroid

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'Don't you know who I am?...I've decided to pursue a career as a celebrity, so I'm developing the basic language skills used in the industry.'

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

'My long-range goal is to turn pro and lead the league in product endorsements.'

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

'Most of all, I'd like to thank god. . .'

"That' a wonderful picture, sweetheart. You know, maybe we should keep all of this garbage, in case you become a famous artist."

"We won again, and guess what? A Russian oligarch wants to buy us!"

'Our telephone 'get out the vote' drive reached everyone, unfortunately, they all voted for our opponent.'

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"I'll bet Miss Parker gets teacher of the year for this."

'Wow! no doubt about it son!...You'll grow up to be President of the United States!'

"Maybe I can be a campaign worker."

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

"Someday, I'm gonna be president of the United States."

Amigos de Mitt.

'Today could well be the day...the day on which the world leaders turn to me to solve their problems...they might just leave it till tomorrow.'