Future Oscar Winner Gifts

"The first half of my life I waited for Hollywood to call. Now, ironically enough, I'm Hollywood and I can call people."

"Why are you playing out in your nativity play costume, son?"

'You're looking for someone to play the part of a washed-up, hammy actor?... Hold on, I have someone here who could've been born for the part.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

"When I grow up, I want to become president and eventually the subject of a groundbreaking, critically-acclaimed Broadway musical."

"Remember, kids, it's not winning that matters, it's getting a clean urine sample that's important."

'I have a feeling one day when he grows up he'll be an artist of some kind.'

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

"What do you want to be when you blow up?"

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'We'll send you to acting class when you're older. For now, get up and get ready for school.'

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'Don't you know who I am?...I've decided to pursue a career as a celebrity, so I'm developing the basic language skills used in the industry.'

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

'My long-range goal is to turn pro and lead the league in product endorsements.'

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

"That' a wonderful picture, sweetheart. You know, maybe we should keep all of this garbage, in case you become a famous artist."

'Most of all, I'd like to thank god. . .'

"We won again, and guess what? A Russian oligarch wants to buy us!"

'Our telephone 'get out the vote' drive reached everyone, unfortunately, they all voted for our opponent.'

'Wow! no doubt about it son!...You'll grow up to be President of the United States!'

"I'll bet Miss Parker gets teacher of the year for this."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

'Today could well be the day...the day on which the world leaders turn to me to solve their problems...they might just leave it till tomorrow.'

"They're secret service. They appeared the day Billy decided he wanted to be president when he grew up."

Amigos de Mitt.

"Someday, I'm gonna be president of the United States."

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'