Future Nba Star Gifts

"Winning isn't everything, junior. Making money from product endorsement deals is important too."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

'Wow! That's some growth spurt!'

"Remember, kids, it's not winning that matters, it's getting a clean urine sample that's important."

Exercising

"What do you want to be when you blow up?"

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

The game is tied, and this is the final inning because the sun is setting. I understand, coach, I need to get home before dark!

The team video didn't spotlight my talents. I've hired my own film crew. They'll showcase my skills so college recruiters can see my strengths. Wow! How can the director pack so much into one little video? Great point! Daddy? Tell Steven Spielberg we're going feature length. Nice save!

Mr. K's essay is such a drag! Yeah, but I've got to do really well. Twig! You're such a grind! Am not! Life isn't only about grades. I know! But he's directing the spring musical. And my singing won't get me the part all by itself! English: Gateway to the Grammys.

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'Don't you know who I am?...I've decided to pursue a career as a celebrity, so I'm developing the basic language skills used in the industry.'

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

'My long-range goal is to turn pro and lead the league in product endorsements.'

Future Wrestler

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Writes A Top Ten Hit

"We won again, and guess what? A Russian oligarch wants to buy us!"

'He'll be a great basketball player someday -- he already dribbles all over the place.

I'm trying out for the spring play. You'll be great! Ha! You'll be grateful to be an usher, Meryl Creep. Yeah. The good parts go to real actors. Sigh. The arts are sooo uplifting.

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

'I can just see him twenty years down the road pitching for the Giants.'

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

'We're going to insist that he at least finish kindergarten before entering the NBA draft.'

"I promised myself I would never let this happen to me."

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'

'Kid, go out there and play like you're worth 29 million plus signing bonus, buyouts, and endorsement deals. '