Future In-laws Gifts

What're you doing for Thanksgiving? Hanging out with my future in-laws. Ouch. No way, it's going to be so great. They're really nice people. I am so excited. I'm bursting with joy. I cannot wait! Are those hives? Help me fake my death.

'The shop lost my headress.'

'Last seen running away from St. Paul's Church...'

Wedding ceremony

Groom's supporters v Bride's supporters

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

"You never told me your dad was so delightfully old-fashioned."

“I have to warn you - my parents are a bit old-fashioned.”

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

Stockwell's day

'So, you're an organ-grinder's monkey? A professional beggar? Is that how you intend to support my daughter?'

'See, Dear? Told you I'd make it fit!'

"I've been in the doghouse ever since I tried to get my mother-in-law hanged as a witch."

"A gentleman would offer his seat."

It's a good thing our neighbors don't know what weirdos we are.

"Mum, Dad... I'd like you to meet my fiance, Goldilocks."

'It's only fair Geraldine. I had to meet your parents.'

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

"If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder he always swears he did not commit."

'He takes after your mother' (colour)

"Remember, they're just as afraid of you as you are of standing up to your mother."

'Mummy, Daddy, this is Dylan. Dylan's ambition is to make conkers a recognized Olympic sport.'

'He just outlawed his in-laws.'

'It's time you learned, son - in-laws and outlaws aren't necessarily opposites.'

'It was so romantic. He got down on one knee, showed me the ring, and proposed--right after we exchanged credit reports.'

"He takes after your mother"

"He intends to die with dignity, he desires a modest funeral, and he's determined to prevent the buzzards from getting any part of the estate."

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

"Darling, there's an offer for a time-share nest in Florida: Should we apply?"

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

'...In functionality and in dysfunctionality....'

"It seems like only yesterday we were in the age range advertisers covet."

"Friend or foe?"

"My wife is constantly invading my personal space. I think she gets it from her family."