Future Academic Gifts

"You put PhD on birth certificate?!" "It's never to early to give em an advantage."

'You're never going to follow me in my trade, Son - you may as well go to university.'

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

'In which on-line university will you enroll?'

'That's all there is in my college fund? That won't even buy the beer!'

'I'd like you meet Toby. Toby is doing a gap year with us before going to Cambridge.'

College of Further Education. . .AND FEES.

"I know it's the first week of class, but I want to ask...how many of you are going to college?"

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"Welcome to the future"

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

Eternal Student.

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

Molecular Biology and Cosmology buildings

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"Meet the scribe"

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."