Future Scholar Gifts

'We've decided to support you for the rest of your life. It's cheaper than sending you to college.'

'That piggy bank is for my college fund.'

I hope my parents can pay off their college loans before I go to college.'

'That should be good for quite a few doctoral dissertations in the future.'

'I'm enrolling in an online course to learn how to apply for a loan for an online university.'

'Explain to us, son, how gaining nine A levels is uncool and damages your street cred.'

Image of school girl with backpack.

Lone student with loan.

'At £9,000 a year it's time to start worrying about 'owe' levels!'

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"I know there are a few things I don't understand, but second grade should take care of that."

'Congratulations son! You've got into your first choice school.'

'Someday she'll say those 3 words and make me the happiest guy in the world - 'You passed math.''

'Someday, you'll grow up, go to college, and find yourself drowning in debt, just like the big boys!'

'This is a bogus diploma. You get the real one after you repay your student loans.'

'It says 'report card'. What kind of prodigy are you?'

"If you insist on giving me a gift for being accepted into Oxford, I could use a new DVD player...gift wrapped in a BMW."

"Today we're filling out mock college applications."

"One day, I'm going to the University of Oxford."

"Class, this is Mr. Elzondo. He's going to talk about going to college."

"Gracie, don't worry. I created a college fund for you the day after you were born. I figure by the time you're 18, it'll total $28,000."

Parental Role Model

"An educational toy is my immediate goal, but my long range plan is to get him on Jeapordy!"

Back to School in Cuba

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

'Here's the deal - whoever draws the high card gets funded.'

'I had no idea there would be a test.'

'F.G.G. First Grade Graduate.'

'How dare you deny my son's application because of his low SAT scores! Everyone knows that test is culturally biased.'

"Sure, I pray all the time... English test, Math test, History test...."

Wow! Look at all these college brochures. You're soo popular! The top colleges in the country want me to apply! Um, Twig. You know they're trolling for applicants to boost their stupid rankings. That's ok. At least I'll be rejected by the very best! You can visit me at Harvard.

Evaluating Colleges!

Yahoo! What's that about? She got into the college of her choice. Which college is it? Not sure. She chose to apply to 37. West Fester High School.

The seniors are crazed about college. Admissions. I plan to be totally chill. 1000 colleges. You're not worried about the pre-SATs this Saturday? Of course not. West Fester High. I forgot all about them!!!

You can tell which seniors got accepted early admission! West Fester High School.