Furniture Sales Gifts

Flat pack sales assistant

"How many out of ten? Hello."

"I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own..."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

Interior design trends for parents....

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"The knights of the round accent table"

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"Surprise!"

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

'Adam and Eve in the garden of Sweden'

'This chair ain't big enough for the both of us.'

Lay-Z-Family Recliner

'I'd like to match this credenza.'

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

'Make up your mind, folks... King size or Queen size?'

Leda knew it was serious when the visited Ikea together.

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

Man reads a book while seated in a loveseat as a cat peers over the seat at him.

An assortment of vegetables in the form of Tables

"Sitting on a beanbag doesn't take me back to the seventies- it just makes me wonder how I'm ever going to get up again."

"Why does the chair always get to chair these meetings?"

'Sorry about this, but I really need a rug for my bachelor pad.'

"Pretty cushy, am I right?"