Furniture Humorist Gifts

It's A Footstool! It's A Hassock!!It's... OTTOMAN!!!

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Frog to other frog: 'Hey, nice pad.'

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

Still Life With Nordic Track

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

"I now pronounce you a partial place setting."

Duvet nailed to the floor.

"We've decided to give you a bonus, Rick. It's any change you find under the cushions."

Town Planning Department

'If the GPC built office blocks!'

Dog Bookends

"Gap... Tony Soprano fit"

"Buying the largest TV on the market was a good idea. Mounting it was not."

Shaker furniture: The flamboyant years.

It looks like wood, but it's actually vinyl siding.

Oh, one door closes, another opens -- How have you been?

Model Village/Realistic Model Village.

'Design brief.'

"Reproduction furniture."

"The carpet really brings the room together."

Fire Escapes

Valentines for Real Estate

Goldfish in Bowl, "And this is the sitting room and the bedroom and the toilet and...."

"We'll take it."

"Well, you did say that you were just looking for something to get you started on the property ladder."

Budget Recliner

"Look, you always hated the wicker furniture and bamboo is scarce, so consider it a win-win."

A giant ape struggles to climb twin towers.

Estate agents lined up for sale during house-price slump.

'Beats me why I took this place. No en-suite, no walk-in robe and no dining room!'

"I'll carry you over a regular threshold, darling, as soon as the housing market improves."

'The principal says her door is always open, until it slams shut when you're in there!'

Landlord holding back a tennant from his money: 'It's all part of the service!'

'I see this one is detached. Yes, the ones on either side fell down.'