Fur-parent With Sass Pillows

"What I want to eat? That's easy. Anything you don't have."

"I think she's figured out what W-A-L-K means."

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

'It's okay - he knows how to use the GPS.'

Babies vs. Dogs

"Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

'Who had the ocean whitefish and tua paté?'

Walking the dog - 'surprise'!

'A bone is a bone is a bone...'

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

'We've tried everything else without success and have now made the decision to adopt.'

"Stop asking me. I don't know who's a good boy."

When is he coming home buddy?

"Helen, Don, you're probably wondering why I called you here today. I'm afraid the answer is achingly simple: I can't get down."

"I'm beginning to worry she might work out who is really in charge."

'A vet!! Take Princess to a vet?'

"In obedience school, I was voted 'Most likely to chew a slipper'."

'We've GOT to get the bullet out,,,'

'I heard him mention your name, what does neutered, mean?'

"And they say WE have a shedding problem!"

"Pampered?"

Vets: 'That's funny, he was here a minute ago.'

Cat to owner: 'Define 'affection'.'

"You've got to lay off the homework."

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

"We've known each other for years Bob, and this grooming style suited you when you were young, but it's time to let it go!"

Pet Owners' Date Night

"He's sending an instant message."