Fur-ever Friend Gifts

Dog on leash waiting outside an outhouse. (His owner is inside)

"What kind of 'best friend' expects you to pick up their sh*t?"

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

"A little help, please."

Super pets.

Woman setting out a dinner party with name cards labeled cat person, dog person.

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

'Remember me?'

Boy and his dog

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

'Can you give him something to relax his jaws?'

'No JAMIE,you're NOT keeping any strays! Now GET rid of him and go wash up for dinner!...' / 'Sorry kiddo,i tried...'

Of course your master calls you 'Man's best friend'. As your attorney I advise you to get it in writing.

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

"If I adopt you, you're going to have to wake me up and walk me twice a day."

'Before I undertake my journey, I require you to make me a warrior's headband.'

Over the years, Marvin began to look like his bull mastiff.

"It's nice to be wanted."

"Hold my calls for a while, Wilson."

"Don’t worry, girl. I’m working on our ‘no puppy left behind.’"

Living with a cataholic.

'Ben has his own cute little ways to show his dislike for dry food.'

'Can't one eat in peace!'

"Owning a pet is a big responsibility, not to mention never wearing dark clothing again."

'Master is too lazy to walk us, so we walk each other...'

'My wife doesn't understand us.'

"OK, so just to recap: Small bowl is you, big bowl is me."

Jerry had a difficult time coming up with cartoon ideas over the noise his dogs made. '...so then the cat says, 'No, thanks. I'll clean it myself.' 'Ha,ha! Yeah, that's a good one,Phil!'

'You know, I almost envy you sometimes.'

'I would love to play in your tree-house, but I can't climb trees...'

'What do we think? We think it's foolish to skip obedience school and go straight to the NBS...'

One man and his dog.

'Hunger is a terrible thing, especially around dinner time!'