Funny Sports Lover Gifts

"I'm sorry I called you boring."

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Alternative fielding positions

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

'Best save I've ever seen.'

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

Ok, ok, maybe you guys are right - maybe I do have a concussion.

Pole Vault Rules

'We've conducted a chemical analysis of the beef in hot dogs, and we've determined, Mr Ruth, you are guilty of steroid enhancement.'

The Cricketer and the Golfer

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

'...And Timmy, as usual, will guard goal.'

I think it's time to retire from boxing. I'm too old for life in the fist lane.

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

Captain Ahab and Moby Dick in Retirement

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

'In this...um...part of the circle...'

Jack Nicholas - Sun-Visor

Foam finger gets stuck up a foam nose.

'Relax, teamwork always leads to a slam dunk.'

Dominique Valera - The King/Cat

The only drug this league tests positive for is Geritol.

'Let's practice lobs again.'

'While Dewey distracts the defense, the quarterback simply jogs into the end zone untouched.'

'Must be that new 3D football.'

'I'm so embarrassed I'll never be able to hold up my head again.'

"Kill the third base umpire."

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

'Oh, dude. Maybe the electronics store has a, throws like a little girl return policy.'