Funny Plant Lover Gifts

'Say when.'

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

Palms. When fully grown that species will provide some nice shade in your your yard. Fronds with benefits.

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

"Have you guys seen my recent collab with the universe?"

"Which of these will look the prettiest without the others?"

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

Gardening#2

Bonsai tree held up by matchstick

Hardy Annuals

Water the hydrangeas twice a week and trim as needed. The bromeliad only needs to be high-fived on Saturday, but you can give it high and low fives anytime you have a spare moment. Just, whatever you do, don't give it a "too slow" or it will turn inward and begin shutting down.

Mantis Love

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

A Venus cow trap.

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

"He treated associates like he treated his plants."

"What are you in for?"

Pea

Person carrying balloons and plants.

Undignified Exits of the Planet World: Geronimo!

'Well doctor that will be the Mabato Tree Snake.'

'Oh my - hasn't he grown!'

"Things are getting really bad around here. Phil, the office plant, was just let go."

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

Poinsettia

"You've definitely got water retention..."

Pollination Process

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

Our eco-prom theme is "Jungle Paradise." Decorations will be live plants. I see where this is leading. Can you bring in trees and bushes for the night? Sure. But

"We only test our drugs on plants, so we have to do lots and lots of extrapolating."

Biotechnology in agriculture

"May I remind you that our prenuptial agreement called for me to take the plants?"

"I called you my little succulent because you're low maintenance."

"It's inoperable and perennial."

The beautiful but deadly 'Venus dog trap'.