Funny Bone Detective Gifts

"So there you were, trapped in a no-future job."

Skeleton playing fetch.

"So...what are you doing after you graduate?"

What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"

'I'm looking fo someone who can make me laugh.'

'Reflexes seem normal. You kept him waiting over two hours.'

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

An early space launch attempt.

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

'The program is stupid, primitive, embarrassing, and boring. I want to buy a new telly.'

'I did my research paper on Bart Simpson!'

Punkins

Stand-up comic/ceo: 'A funny thing happened on the way to the board meeting...'

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

"... And don't come back until you're ready to get funny."

"You want to be a comedian? You can't be serious!"

'Is it okay to apologize for something I'm going to do?'

Cut out and keep your own Gardener!

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

'Turns out medicine is the best medicine.'

Fetch the Boomerang

'Will you marry me if I can get funding?'

He. 'How would you like to own a--er--a little puppy?' She. 'Oh, Mr. Softly, this is so sudden!'

'Hi....I'm on my driving test....'

"Well yes, pretty and kind were big factors, but her nitpicking abilities are what really won me over..."

"Our forensic scientist quit, so our computer guy has stepped in for now."

Movers and shakers.

"There's no point trying to complain, everyone is on a 'customer care' course."

"Wise?! You believe you're wise!!"