Funeral Curious Pillows

Grave digger hammering head-stone into dead persons head

'Yes, death signifies a cosmic change of address. Alas, your husband's mail will not be forwarded.'

Book Thief in True Crime Department

"Could you spare a few minutes to give some feedback on your death experience?"

"I see he finally got rid of that idiotic comb-over."

"Dearly beloved - We gather today to honor the life of the greatest magician of our time."

I told myself I wasn't going to cry at his funeral

"You fool! This isn't embalming fluid, this is my coffee."

"His last wish was that we delete his browsing history."

Crash Test Dummy Funerals.

'She was always very proud of her figure.'

'I told you that something was wrong with your cousin Wilbur.'

Coffin of clown on stilts is carried at funeral.

"Dad, tell me about the birds and the bees and safeguards."

'You're sure that's one of the stages of grief?'

'This sucks. Let's try and start the wave.'

Losing a loved one is never easy. The trick is to make it look easy.

Snake funerals.

The four hearsemen with the Alpaca lips.

"Never lend money to anyone over 90."

"We gather here today in memory of Chuckles, Kornflake, Doodles, Yo-Yo, Cupcake...."

"She looks sooo good."

"We were out of embalming fluid so we stuffed your wife with wild rice."

'First, let me emphasize that the open casket was his idea.'

"We also have urns, if you want to think outside the box."

'Some people couldn't make it today, but they've sent a few tweets...'

'They always say such nice things about the departed at funerals, it's a pity they're not able to hear them.'

Chinese Funerals.

"Yes, it's my husband Ron, it was cheaper to get him stuffed than buried."

'He would have wanted it this way, Molly.'

Are you sure this is what your husband meant when he said he wanted a quiet send-off?

"Sir, did the piano die?"

'My life coach said don't wait for what you want, just take it, so I did and look where it got me.'

'It was his last request. He was a track star in college.'

'No, no, lets steal this one. It has a lifetime warranty.'