Fun-loving Eaters Gifts

'Could I have a look at your childrens menu? It's only my inner child that's hungry!'

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Party Animals.

"That's it. We’re toast."

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

"Fresh pepper?"

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

Peel poker.

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

(Scheduled) Sex, (Prescription) Drugs & (Classic) Rock & Roll

'Do you want us to wait till the meat is completely burned or can we call the pizza service right now?'

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

Al's Diner. Special: Spaghetti. All You Can Eat $3.95. Ernie, don't play with your food unless you're sure you can win.

F&E Subs. Hey, you replaced the little swords with periscope-shaped toothpicks! Nice touch, Ernie!

"Yes, it's different...but I don't think Fondue Friday is going to last."

'The early bird can have the worm as far as I'm concerned -- I'd rather sleep in and then go to McDonald's.'

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"I like my steak well done."

'I really love this stuff, but I still have a lot of trouble with sushi.'

"Today's special is puréed sweet potato on cracker."

'If you mean Janet, she works the late shift.'

'Sure, it's nourishing, but regurgitated fish is not what I would call a culinary feast...'

"Mom, Eugene picked all the peanuts off the pizza!"

'Snob, he won't eat domestic slugs, just imports.'

"I don't care what Siri said. Wheaty Puffs are good for you, so eat them up."

Barry's new George Foreman Grill warned him anytime the meat was being overcooked.

'I'm sorry, sir, but cheeseburgers are out of season.'

Bar Refaeli

"If dinner was a reality TV show broccoli would be the first thing I'd vote off!!"

'I'm afraid things are rather confused around here today, sir- the Soup of the Day is a grilled-cheese sandwich'

What can I get you? Coffee? Tea? Sandwich? The mackerel mocha sounds lovely. What's in it? The usual. Chocolate. Soy milk. Mackerel. Yes, but is the mackerel farm-raised or from the sea? Ocean. Atlantic? Pacific? Indian? Arctic? Antarctic? I'm not sure. Oh. Ok ... well what's the mackerel's mercury content? Negligible, I'm sure. Ok. Was it exposed to any chlorine? Or copper sulphate? Or malathion? Was it treated with kindness? Was it read stories and sung to before bedtime? Yes. Never mind, it s