Fun Gag Gift Collector Pillows

'You're really not in control of yourself!'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'No swimming. No breathing.'

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

'Colin's dying to show you how his renewable energy scheme works.'

Ball as water-melon.

'It's a farton, fartoff lamp!'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Good Dentist ~ Bad Dentist

Comedy School: 'Please knocky nicky nooo!'

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

'I haven't had the urge for a cigarette for two days. How's the patch working for you?'

"Sure I can't pop that in a bag for you, sir?"

"For the missus or yourself?"

Egypt 1896. Dr Howard Prendergast and Percy Smythe discover the tomb of King Ahktuman the Practical Joker, proving conclusively that the ancient Egyptians were the first culture to use whoopee cushion.

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."

'...and don't think I didn't see that flying tackle.'

Undertaker with 'light', 'done', and 'RIP' settings on his toaster.

Joke Shop product - Not Funny After 10 Sept 87

'Congratulations - you're the first victim of recombinant DNA.'

"You must see someone about your problem."

Wise man scaring baby Jesus.

'Admit it you need glasses, that is my false eyelash you have just sprayed.'

The Fart Side