Fuel Frugality Gifts

Bank Loans - 'We were looking to buy a tank of petrol.'

We provide a loan officer with every fill-up.

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

"In the current market, it's just more practical."

'It's cheaper than gas.'

Cheapskate Cruises

Doris was determined to save money on cat parlour fees!

'How much did you save this year?'

Gas tank is holding up a customer for money 'Fill 'er up!'

Oil shock.

'Less spare change under the cushion is my leading economic indicator!'

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

"What do you mean 'upgrade' the server? The old one works just fine."

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"Is that neat whisky?"

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

'But on the plus side, I felt better about owning a SUV as soon as I bought some oil stocks.'

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

"Do you have something cheap but with a really expensive label?"

'And don't say you could have done it cheaper and better at home.'

'Two can't live as cheaply as one, but we will get double - occupancy rates when we travel'

"Fuel poverty is not the same as being too mean to switch the heating on...."

'I wish they would just spring for a paper shredder.'

"How much if I pedal?"

"If I promise to come back serval times, can I get the group rate?"