Fuel-efficient Driver T-Shirts

"This guy was certainly crucified by environmentalists because he drove an SUV, right?"

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

Fuel bill gone through the roof

'Doesn't it feel good to be taking care of our planet?'

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

GAS. If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it.

Underwater on the Car

"It's only until the gas prices go down and I can afford to drive the car again. Maybe you should have an ambulance follow me."

Oil shock.

"It's got an incredible range for an E.V."

I think I can...

'It's a hybrid.'

"Tesla's founder Elon Musk launched his spacex rocket today with a successful pinpoint return to earth. . . General motors said it would rebuild its plant and start again from scratch."

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

"If you want to buy this, I'm afraid I'm going to need to see some justification."

'With the price of petrol, I had to take on a second job to pay for the petrol to drive to my first job!'

'How is it on gas? I was afraid you were going to ask me that.'

'Fuel efficiency? I get about three times around the block on a peanut butter sandwich.'

May or May not be Hazardous Material...

Marv's Preowned Vehicles...That new car smell can kill you! - Buy Used!

You need a bigger car/You need a smaller car.

Peak Oil - 'Are we there yet, Dad?'

"You gotta love the mpg we're getting!"

'Kiss me twice! I got the raise and 36 MPG, highway!'

Used Cars. Think of it this way --- As things fall off, the miles per gallon go up!

Hybrid Autos. I've already got a hybrid car --- half of it belongs to me and half to the bank.

Al's Kwiki-Fix Garage. Why is it that when you guys "run over the estimate", you're never backing up? (Published previously on 1/24/2000.)

'Did I mention the gas mileage?!'

"It's a hybrid if you think it is. Runs on gas and the power of positive thinking."

'And of course you'll need air-conditioning to cope with global warming.'

'This model gets great gas mileage but is recommended only for the very agile driver.'

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

'Ever since we switched from bio-diesel to human beings, the air smells cleaner, the Earth much greener, and the mileage has been unbelievable!'