Frugal Navigator Pillows

'With the price of petrol, I had to take on a second job to pay for the petrol to drive to my first job!'

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Are we there yet?'

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

"I am not asking for directions."

"There's more inside."

Titanic: How's my steering.

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

Battery Lighthouse

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

Department of Nanotechnology

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

"Yeah, I have a GPS, but I have no idea where 120 degrees longitude and 80 degrees latitude is."

"According to the map, we should be nearing the North Pole, but something tells me we’ve been reading the map upside down."

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"For pity's sake, George - stop tooting and ask for directions!"

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

Cheapskate Cruises

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

"I know we said we would get you a laptop.. but this will have to do until business gets better."

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

Set sail

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

Nethead strip: Speak binary

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"