Frugal Friends Gifts

"I guess I really was spending too much money on lattes."

"That thermostat I bought is smart. It knows how cheap I am, so it keeps our home freezing."

"Fine. As long as it doesn't involve spending money."

The cheap skate - 'Separate checks, please.'

'My car was recalled because of a fault. In my bank account.'

"Wait, save your money."

Expensive greeting cards.

Things of the past...

"Remember when all this was free?"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"I just..."

'It's cheaper than gas.'

"We balanced our budget this month!"

'All this talk about a consumer society... I don't buy it.'

"We cancelled Netfix for this?"

GAS. If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it.

Piggy Bank Coin I.V.

"Could I have a bottle of the Chateau Lafitte '67 but filled with the wine from Tesco 2019."

'How much did you save this year?'

"We're going to need more pets."

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

Boss, customers are asking why you've doubled prices. I'm just being fair. When the cost of coffee beans go up, everyone thinks I'm justified in raising the price of coffee. But cost increases come in all shapes and sizes. What about my new 80" tv? What about my new car note? What about my manservant I just imported from London? I dream of the day when all costs can be passed on to customers equally. Greed is not a civil right issue!

"The company must save money. That's why we've got to be easy on the carpet."

"We've got a new financial advisor. I asked him how to cut down on out of pocket expenses and he said to stop wearing clothes with pockets."

'I think we may have an income problem.'

"Why pay for a tree in November when you can get one off the side of the road in January for free?"

'The gas bill is a lot bigger than usual.'

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'