Fresco Gifts

"Why, Giambattista Tiepolo, you old so-and-so! Who knew you could paint?"

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

Diego Velasquez

'Gerald was stripping some old wallpaper, and there it was - Leonard Da Vinci's lost fresco ‘The Battle of Anghiari'.'

"I hear you've a complaint about the eggs..."

"To join OPEC you must be a country and filthy rich in oil."

Pompeii restoration project.

Couple painting each other - one turns to the other and says, 'Hon, let's hire a model.'

'I'm going through my 'blue period' - all my other crayons have broken.'

'Careful, this used to be hot.'

Editor. Short. Sweet.

"The Ceiling is slightly wider than I'd planned."

'The lunch menu has sure picked up since they built the alfresco area.'

"I'd just as soon it wasn't cut into those funny little pieces, if you don't mind."

Cover story: Oil Workers Monthly.

"Alfresco Plumbing & Hardware Supplies"

'They go on a lot of picnics.'

Marine Le Pen

"That! That's why I don't like Alfresco dining!"

'Would you like to eat in the restaurant or dine outside on our Wasp-atorium?'

'It's good, Timmy, but it's not refrigerator good.'

'I hate making decisions - just bring me a bottle of each.'

"Sorry, we don't have a vegetarian option, the lettuce caught fire."

Artist.

Huge capitalist man gulping down barrels of oil

"What sold him was the cathedral ceiling."

Expression of the inner child

Gas: We proudly sell only American drilled petroleum products.

'Todays special is yesterdays left overs.'

'...and was your 5th mouthful to monsieur's satisfaction?'