Free Will Philosophers Gifts

"It's just as we thought Jack, we are exactly in the middle! It's the Buridans Ass paradox!"

Ban on Free Speech

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

'Look on the bright side, more gay marriages means fewer abortions.'

'Hey! What's the big idea!?!'

"They're born into captivity, it's all they know."

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

The Mainstream

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

"She can forgive Nixon, but she can't forgive me."

Henrietta was never one to conform to society's labels. She preferred to think of herself as an 'off-Rhode lsland Red'...

"And in a five-to-four decision today the United States Supreme Court rule that atheits may not barred from foxholes."

"How do I know God is not real? For the same reason I know people on TV can't see me."

Loner sheep sings 'I gotta be me'.

Tom's last day.

I hear you're preaching godlessness, you little heathen. I'm preaching intellectual honesty. There is no proof of a Judeo Christian almighty. You might as well believe in Zeus or the spiritual powers of a raisin scone. Where do you think morality comes from? What do you think is the basis for our civil society? The almighty! All hail the raisin scone! HOJ.

'I'm feeling a little remiss about missing both free throws.'

"See, the problem with doing things to prolong your life is that all the extra years come at the end, when you're old."

The Joy of Six/The Joy of None

And a good morning to you, employee. Happy boss. What's up? Looks like it could be Republicans in 2022. Free market guys, guys who sympathize with the realities of hard-core, cold-hearted, rational capitalism. Makes me want to fire someone. Duck!

Bureau of Disappearing Civil Liberties

"I used to complain about being trapped in a cage, until he got his 250 premium channels."

Atheist United - A Non-Prophet Organization

Meta data retention.

"It's always 'Sit,' 'Stay,' 'Heel'—never 'Think,' 'Innovate,' 'Be yourself.' "

"Sure, I had a retirement plan. Stop going to work"

'Ever stop to consider we live in a gated community?'

Conformity

"Let's face it - if your god existed, I'd been struck dead long ago for mocking her."

Atheist's Rule Ok.

'If these are the best years, can you imagine the crap that's coming?'

It's more about the journey for me!

'Yeah, I'm an atheist - and a damn good one.'

Go To Sleeeeep Britain. . .

"New York is a place of free spirits."