Foxhole Philosopher Gifts

"My shrink said my fear of people not liking me is all in my head."

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

Courage. Love.

Meekness of Mr Pecksniff and his Charming Daughter

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

Grass: We lost some good men today!

"What should I say this is about?"

Clown Nightmares

"I might let the window box lay fallow, this season."

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

Dept. de Philosophie

Sun crashing into sea foils rescue attempt.

'He's got one more minute alone in the penalty box with my mother.'

"Forty years ago on this very seat I proposed to you. Made up your mind yet?"

"I can't live in a glen that has such a narrow definition of what it is to be elfin."

Poet and Peasant

How does she get her grass so green?

"Respect every snowflake as you clear my driveway."

Fox Holes

"I forgot to call in dead."

'...and so I say without fear of contradiction...'

'Thinking INSIDE the box is actually quite underrated!'

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

Pandora's Fax.

Alchemist - name and ate unknown: 'At the Transylvania Conference, everyone was claiming to have the philosopher's stone. As chair of the select committee on turning lead into gold, I expect to have conclusive report within a decade or two.'

"I always just check the box without reading that stuff."

'He's so cute Jean! How old is he now?'

2 min. in the box for roughing, eternity for coughing."

Hockey and Cell Phones

Ladies, we are victims of our own success!

'I don't know what gets into me around the holidays.'

'Yeah. I used to get a lot of 'timeouts' as a kid, too.'

'I do wish she wouldn't be such a human.'

'Sometimes, sitting in the sandbox like this, I realize I've been a disappointment to my parents.'