Formula 1 Fan Gifts

'It's rumoured that he's becoming an alcoholic.'

Abu Dhabi Grand Prix

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"Is it that bad?"

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

'May I say it's a great pleasure to present my work to such a distinquished assembly of my colleagues.'

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

Information booth attendant solves equation

"If you think I ride too fast, Susan...just say so!"

The polar olympics

'...and that is my philosophy.'

'God's speed.'

'Geoffrey's kit car can go from nought to upside down in under nine seconds.'

Smile

'Let's see if we could put a spin on it and get the public interested.'

"Lucky Guess."

"I think I've finally figured out who's on first."

Formula One car origami

"All in all, I'd say it's a pretty convincing explication of chaos theory."

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

'You had me at 'C - R C = (2 x S X).'

The Bagel Wheel Derby.

Formula.

The Math Institute √π*962.9 KM

"Stop being creative and discover something already."

Pig Trotter

22. Being tireless is good trait to have in most jobs, but not when you're working on a pit crew.

"I think you made your mistake right at the beginning!"

'...Or not.'

'I believe you were first.'

'Why did he cut the chicane - the giant spider isn't on the track, he's on our screen.'

1st Place in the Egg and Spoon Race

Daily News Headline Dept. Editor. Here's a story about a guy who shaved his race horse to cut wind resistance, and the horse got a terrible sunburn. "A pony shaved is a pony burned"!