Former Tough Guy Gifts

'I'm coping.'

A Hard Look At Hard Looks

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

'You do realize you're no longer a pro athlete and there is no preseason to work out the kinks, don't you?'

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

Macho talk from down in accounting.

Dick's hobby of collecting manhole covers kept him out of trouble... except of the hernias.

Future Wrestler

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

Attorney Punching Bag

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

Cat boxer

'Dewey is a cowboy's cowboy!'

Man with many tattoos.

"You'll get a lot of head injuries but, on the plus side, you won't remember any of them."

'I've gone over the fight tapes and I think I've pinpointed your weakness.'

"Signal London the continent is cut off!"

All Washed Up

Exhausted men - steep hill 1 in 3

"So...you have a boyfriend?"

"I don't understand. I gave up smoking two years ago."

"Don't be long, Dear, you don't want to miss Celebrity Hari Kari on TV."

'The Raffia Mafia.'

'Goliath, there's money to be made if you take a dive.'

"Dearly beloved, weighing in at one hundred and fifty pounds!"

'So is it a real heart attack, or is he just faking it?'

'Joe Louis was right - you can run, but you can't hide.'

"If it doesn't work bring it back and we'll refund your money."

"I know, it's hideous! But I did a hell of a lot of sky punching during the World Cup and now I'm stuck with it."

Nicola Sturgeon's History Guide To Things We Can Blame The English For...Introduction of the Midge

'I think his hand's getting sore.'

A professional wrestlers prepares to

'See, dear? I told you it still fits!'

Marine Le Pen