Formal Introduction Fan Gifts

"Hi. I'm the babysitter, formerly with Action Data Systems."

'Judge McWit, this is Margaret, party of the first part, heretofore to be known as Maggie.'

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

'He wants to close the deal with a handshake. What do you think about that?'

Life on Earth - The original chat room.

"You've got to stop wearing top hat and tails in the office! Everyone thinks you've got a huge payrise!"

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

"Wow, what a DILF."

The awkwardness of one's first officeplace fist-bump.

"Captain, it appears to be some kind of paragraph."

Management Styles - Inspirational

'Do you have an appointment?'

"So that's my presentation: Could I have 100 million for the startup?"

"One thing about it, we're always ready for prom night"

"Whose great idea was the four four two formation."

I don't care if you have a ticket - hop it.

Masked Pianist

Only a handful of people are this small.

'This is a magnificent restaurant. Which fork should I use to comb my hair?'

'Delivery for Muhammad.'

I never understood why they talk about something "going south" as if it is a bad thing.

I Can't Wait For This Shift To Be Over.

"Darell is sharing his pet with us today. I'm sure the whole class will find this very entertaining."

IRS. Tax Code. It's the mark of a real classic. Every time you reread it, you find something new.

I didn't think I would, but I miss being booed.

'Why does everyone always think I'm the bloody waiter?!'

"The board is in agreement, then - rock and roll will never die."

A boy saying he will wait for the women to leave the room before he eats

Place settings

'Meet Regan the vegan, Ray the gay and Tommie the commie.'

Planning Department Door

Clive Bell

'We weren't expecting a Royal visit.....Where's the King?'

'Rats, I can't do casual...'

Crematorium with sign outside saying 'Yes! We're open.'