Forgotten Credential Warriors Gifts

"...I'm at the end of my tether and don't what to do. I can remember the username - it's just the password..."

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

'So you have a PhD, big deal, everyone working here has one! The question is, what can you really do?'

"It's translated from French, so where it says 'Harvard Business School' it may mean 'jail.'"

Studying and technology

"And what did my little darling do in school today?"

No room to hang his diploma.

Academia Can Kill By Degrees

Art Museum: Our exhibit of forgotten masters continues with What's His Name...

'You might not know it now but I used to have some great lesson plans.'

"Just teachers' lounge will suffice, Ed."

'The LACK of a resume indicates that I don't need one.'

'Thank you, sir. NEXT, PLEASE!'

"I know you went to Harvard, but stop asking to see my resume."

"All staff are equal...but some are more equal than others!"

'I'm sorry - Mr. Jenkins, MBA, PhD, MD, Esq. is O.U.T.'

'Come on. It's time to wage education.'

"Sorry, no more room. What a shame, I’m the teacher."

"Tell me about the bar codes and sales prices on the back of your certification diplomas."

"My son uses his license plate as a password. No wonder his computer keeps crashing."

'If I didn't flunk something every once in a while, how would I ever learn anything?'

"You shouldn't blame your father for the 'F'...you should do assignments yourself!"

Help. High performing teacher trapped in low performing pay scale.

"Why can't you give me a student loan? I'm a student."

Just Another Bully.

"Look darling, she's forgot her first password."

"Personally, I prefer seeing the graduates dance across the stage."

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie: My name is Morgan Peterson and I work with the finance house here in the Netherlands. Our late client, Mr. Williams, bequeathed his entire $650,000,000 estate to you. He was a big fan of your show. Anyway, so that the funds can be transferred to you, all I need is your bank account number and password, your social security number, name, address, phone number, birthdate, and the times when you are away from home. There is no risk to you. Sincerely, Morgan Peterson. I will h

"To what do I owe this honor?"

Glad-You-Ation

"… and this one too, doc — 'university' is definitely spelled wrong."

WHEW!

'She's our first born. We haven't picked a name, but it will be case sensitive with at least one numeral.'

'Oh yes, you need specific credentials to be a town planner.'

"How can they say it's getting easier - this is rocket science."