Forgetful Gourmand T-Shirts

'Gone to memory trainning class, your dinner could be in the oven?'

Recipes from the Jean-Paul Sartre Cookbook

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

"No need to remind me. I'm well aware that I've forgotten completely about you."

'You forgot your glasses again, didn't you?'

S. S. All You Can Eat

'I'll have the 'All of the above.''

Woman watching cookery show on TV while cooking a microwave meal.

Belated Birthday Cards

'What goes with leftovers?' 'I have a bottle of dregs here someplace.'

"Jeffrey eats everything, Mom, because no one has told him what he doesn't like."

'I couldn't put the book down... I had peanut butter and jelly on my hands!'

Endangered Entrees

'It seems the environment people, the health department and the food and drug administration all have reservations about his place.'

Why Chemists shouldn't take their work home "I can't believe it's not b-b-vegetable mono & dyglycerides!"

"I'd like seconds!"

"What do you fancy for breakie?"

'The chef says that the quail was out but he prepared that little critter he ran over on the motorway which tastes similar and you nouveau riche snobs will never notice the difference anyway.'

'I just saw this fall out of a chicken's bum...let's eat it!'

"The I'm Going Off My Diet special comes with a side order of Guilt."

'Tom Jones is still my favorite movie. It has the most explicit eating.'

Giant squid attacks ship. Pirate asks: 'Who ordered the calamari?'

Forgetfulness - The seven warning signs.

"Do you have a lean cuisine, waiter?"

"You forgot the mayo! I swear, you would forget your head if it wasn't bolted on."

"Hmmmmm -- Choices, choices..."

"Of course only buying 'organic' CAN be expensive! Another pea anyone?"

'Hey! You've forgotten THIS monstrosity!'

'You would forget the doggie bag!'

'Of course I'm back. You didn't think I'd be that easy to get rid of did you?'

'What'll it be - one large risk or several small ones?'

'I need to work on my case-management skills - I've left mine on the train again.'

"Your apple surprise, sir."

"Thanks. I'd forget my head if it wasn't.. No one's handed in a head have they?"