Ghostly Gourmand T-Shirts

'Of course I'm back. You didn't think I'd be that easy to get rid of did you?'

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

"It's fondue night!"

'I'm afraid the Chef's Surprise today is that he ran off with one of the waitresses.'

'I'll have the 'All of the above.''

Woman watching cookery show on TV while cooking a microwave meal.

Dijon Vu

"Try and push the eye of newt and wing of bat casserole."

"Of course this is a pizza! Man, I've always been a rebel!"

"I recommend the businessman's lunch, sir, mammon notwithstanding."

God Cooks Up Evolution

"I'd like seconds!"

'Oh please uncle Jim! Tell us another creepy story of the living!'

'It's just Frank's ghost returning for a bottle of wine. It doesn't tend to keep well, where he ended up.'

'Chefs, the secret ingredient for tonight's competition is - wing of bat!'

"Cemetery Pie"

'It seems the environment people, the health department and the food and drug administration all have reservations about his place.'

Capturing a Cook

No matter where. . . everyone gravitates toward the kitchen.

The experience was exhilarating. You could eat like a pig and weigh nothing.

Endangered Entrees

"The book, How to Serve Man! It's. . . It's a cook book, filled with recipes that use MSG and transfats!"

"You're not going to believe this -- they're making deep-fried manna."

'What d'you say to a massive Szechuan-style wok fry-up before we start?'

"That doesn't make any sense - The Milky Way shouldn't affect your lactose-intolerance."

'I'm actually a soy milky way.'

"Unitarian. You?"

'Enjoy? Don't tell me what to do.'

"If you'll excuse me, my adventurous palate is at constant war with my delicate ecosystem of gut bacteria."

'This must be their seasonal menu. These prices are scary!'