Forest Storyteller Gifts

"I don't know anything about forest fires. I ate a ranger."

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

The Environmentalist

'I love our hideaway. I only wish we could find it.'

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

"This is Blackjack, come in Yahtzee."

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

"Where the wild things were."

"I'm spooked - they don't want candy, they want ice water!"

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

“Hey Everyone! It’s the first day of Fall! Okay, you go first!”

Silhouette hawk swooping down to catch a silhouette rabbit.

School trip little porters.

Rude Snowpeople

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

Dragon Recycling the Knights it has defeated

"Go ahead, tell him... Your friend is correct. Nuts are fruit. Why won't you ever believe me?"

"By God, Man! Yes!! This is the stuff we're looking for!"

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

"Does the N.R.A. know about this?"

Evidence of the Mythic Unicornbrowcycle,

"I'm not really sure what is weirder: that that bear did not maul us, or that he did hug us..."

Lion to safari man: 'I'm the king of the jungle and these are my official spokesmen.'

'Eric! Look for his pressure point! He's got to have a pressure point somewhere!'

Two 'superheros' show the discrepancy in toilet paper production.

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

The Four Horsemen of Trees: Beavers, Hammocks, Bugs, Unpainted Furniture.

Atomic Bear: Part 2

"Well, I deal with death and carrion every day: Laughing is a therapeutic way of avoiding depression..."

"You're overprotective. Stop telling her not to go out on a limb."

Polar Bear Paparazzi.

Finding Bigfoot