Wildlife Storyteller Gifts

Trap set by bear to catch hunter.

"I touched another squirrel's nuts. Any other questions?"

'Oh yes, when I was a young mongoose, I would fight cobras, but my reflexes are not what they used to be now...'

'Mum: She pulled my mane!'

. . . And when Larry lifted the rock, there it was, the least liked member of the animal kingdom - the Tattle Snake.

"You let him go?! Think! How likely was that rabbit to really be a scientist on the cusp of finding a cure for cancer?!"

The Environmentalist

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

"Happy Gnu Year!"

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

"Too much concealer?"

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"Eat me"

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

Silhouette hawk swooping down to catch a silhouette rabbit.

'Pray for me.'

Giraffe Portrait

Dragon Recycling the Knights it has defeated

'I don't know about the ecosystem, but the economy seems to be on the upswing.'

Bug reading book has antennae that are lights.

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

'I wanted a change in decor.'

"By God, Man! Yes!! This is the stuff we're looking for!"

'You know, after a long hard winter, I just HATE eating out of cans.'