Wilderness Storyteller Gifts

Robinson Crusoe - In his Hut with Animals

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

'Remember only you can prevent forest fires.'

The Environmentalist

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

Support Group for a Good Problem

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

A vampire in a canoe.

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

Camping.

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

'Dad! Dad! Dad!!. . . We lost our signal.'

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

'One of the first rules, kids, be sure to watch where you step.'

Do it! Go into the woods alone!...

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

Silhouette hawk swooping down to catch a silhouette rabbit.

"I was hoping summer camp would be more ... campy."

"Can we set the flame to a medium high?"

"...and those are my deepest, most intimate feelings about our friendship."

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

Dragon Recycling the Knights it has defeated

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."