Timber Storyteller Gifts

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

'Remember only you can prevent forest fires.'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

Support Group for a Good Problem

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

A vampire in a canoe.

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"The knights of the round accent table"

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

Camping.

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

'One of the first rules, kids, be sure to watch where you step.'

Do it! Go into the woods alone!...

Silhouette hawk swooping down to catch a silhouette rabbit.

D.I.Y

"...and those are my deepest, most intimate feelings about our friendship."

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

"I was hoping summer camp would be more ... campy."

"Today, son, you are a man."

"Hickory smoke—that's what gives it that hearty Western flavor."

Scouts made this for me

Camping with Mr. Thorough

"Oh Wow! Shooting star!"

Sunny with a chance of Helium

"See, dear, it's only an owl hooting...."

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'