Forest Jokester Gifts

'...And if that doesn't work, grab your rifle and start blasting away.'

"Ha! The joke's on him. All I did was pee."

"I don't care about the money. I just hate trees."

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

'I'm telling you Fred, this can of silver paint is going to improve your love-life!...'

Tarzan of the Grapes.

I fart more than that!

Snowman of the Apes

"Do you think the birds like me?"

'Well, I got a hunting license and a fishing license and by golly I'm going to use them.'

"Must get a longer cable."

"Influence this."

'Can I have a Banana-Split' without the ice-cream?'

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

'Fancy a swift half?'

Watering the garden gnome

'Hey, Fred! You have a relative visiting.'

'So much for the 'Eye of the Tiger'.'

'Well, you always said you wanted a water feature for the garden.'

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

'The reports were right...he's using tools!'

Man sees half-eaten 'Do Not Feed the Bears' sign

"My husband is fishing. . ."

Squirrel chopping wooden leg of lumberjack.

Monkey Business

Gardener digging and finding pipes.

"Pff! That orang utan's obviously a crisis actor!"

"That's Gilbey's hat and Gilbey's binoculars, but that's definitely not Gilbey."

"It's so warm that I'm laying hard boiled eggs."

"I touched another squirrel's nuts. Any other questions?"

'Do you think anyone will notice my funny hat shaped like a fish?'

I know you can't forget, but you should learn to forgive...

'I wouldn't call myself a vegetarian, but I don't eat dead animals either.'

"Oh goodie, pigs in a blanket."

"Stop right there, it's my stockbroker: I have to take this!"