Foodie Laughers Gifts

"It's an unpretentious little eatery..."

"War is hell and so is this soup."

Lesser known greek gods,

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

Filet minion

Bangers and Mash

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'I think I'll go home and eat'

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

I'm freshwater. Make it a margarita without salt.

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

Garlic Free Zone.

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

'Barb had her stomach replaced with a mouse's stomach to help her eat less.'

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

Cat eats date.

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

Better Not Squash.

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

F&E Diner. I'll bet you want the alphabet soup, right? Hey! Don't put words in my mouth!

Debbie greatly misinterpreted the marriage counselor's suggestion that she and Tom have a monthly 'date night.'

'Well you said you wanted sushi for lunch.'

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."