Foodie Humor Lovers Gifts

"Mixed nuts are brain food, or so I read in 'Mixed Nut Digest'."

'Man, they sure know how to be cruel! 24 hours a day of the Gournet Food Channel!'

'I came, I saw a gallimaufry of food, and the rest is a blur until I landed here.'

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

Filet minion

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

Lockdown casserole

Better Not Squash.

Where 'Turkey Bacon" Comes From

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

"Here's the pub-grub you ordered"

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

Murderous Chef

'I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.' (chef shaking chicken).

'I thought a perfect martini would cover the 'well balanced' requirement of my night to cook.'

'Good news - we're merging with Mellman's Jelly and Alpine Toast.'

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

All you can eat chicken $3.95: "Cooked is 20 dollars extra."

'It's beans OR toast, not beans ON toast.'

'Oh boy, my favourite: Cheese Fondue...'

'He's cured.'

'The Big Beg Theory'

"I'll have the duck Poussin."

'You're eating all the wrong food.'

"The other waiters just spit in the food of rude customers, not in their faces!"

''Catch of the day' is anyone who tries to leave without paying.'

'Trouble cutting pickled onions.'

And then I said, "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." So he said "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." Of course, I had to say, "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." It happens every year -0 the turkey never fails to put him to sleep!"

'I tried the new restaurant today: they have a three course menu...'

'Apparently, the carrot cake really is to die for.'