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Pasta

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"I didn't invent the wheel. I invented the pizza."

'Running your own business means being self-made, unfortunately it also means finding out what you're made of!'

'Gentlemen-the sweets smell of success!'

"It's this trend that leads us to believe we should supplement our oil commodities with investments in some of the Earth's rich vinegar and crouton reserves."

'They ought to change the name of this deli to The Cramer - they get it wrong 50 of the time.'

"Ambitions... to eat, drink and be merry."

"Liverwurst is down an eighth, egg-salad is up two and a half, and peanut-butter-and-jelly remains unchanged."

Chinese Novel Cookie

'You shouldn't put all your cash into one stock... you need to diversify. Try buying beef, vegetable and chicken stock...'

'And just how much is silver going for a troy ounce these days?'

Cooking the books

"The crab Florentine is excellent, but the rack of lamb has limited downside risk.''

'You said we can grow our own food. So, where's the hot dog seeds.'

Cheesemaker

"You'll never soar like an eagle, but your wings will make you very popular."

Pork bellies 3 times a day...cookbook for the commodities investor.

"He's working out what he can buy when his pay rise comes through."

'We've had a cash machine put in.'

Man reading fortune cookie: 'Hey, cool - it's an up-to-the-minute stock report.'

"Putting a steak, chicken wings and potato chips on a salad kind of negates the eating healthy concept."

"I used to be a foodie. Now I'm a fussy glutton."

Giggling madly, the lemon seed drifted over to the straw and waited...

'Mrs. Gersten, I'm taking you out of trans-fatty acid stocks, and putting you into fruits and veggies'

"I never thought I'd be saying this, but I'd like some hospital food."

Phelps,Timmon & Ashe Restaurant

'You call yourself a full-service broker? Where are the danish and muffins?'

'Before we start, would anyone like any grated cheese on their quarterly report?'