Foodie Blunderer Gifts

Man faced with a fridge full of food can't find the dinner left for him by his wife

HELLth Food Sprouts

'Your blood pressure is extremely high - your resistance to things that cause it, extremely low!'

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

Do-it-yourself sushi bar serves live fish to customer.

Fast Food Dieter

"I'm not trying to freak you out, but your eel roll is moving."

'I had the recipe upside down, so it's beefed corn.'

The moat won't keep you from raiding the fridge if you order him to lower the drawbridge.

"He's a fussy eater."

'My French is not so good.'

Doughnut Criminals

"Every time my wife has an accident in the kitchen, I end up eating it. . ."

All You Can Eat Buffet: "Remember, my safe word is 'Diabetes.'"

"When you came down for a snack last night, did you see a plate of dog food in here?"

'This restaurant has got zero stars, right? Every single one of them is well deserved.'

Pizza Exam: 'Just deliver it around the back of 'B' block. The money will be by the window. . .'

Tiny restaurant portion. Man finds magnifying glass amongst cutlery.

"I'm looling for ground beef that's organic, non-GMO, and doesn't contain meat."

"You asked me to keep a food diary, this is last week's!"

"Fred? Can you help me? I'm really in a jam."

What do you mean it's not vegetarian? The maggots all jump out...

'How can anything this bad be fattening?.'

'Give me a size 12 please.'

"The I'm Going Off My Diet special comes with a side order of Guilt."

'Now that I can afford anything on the menu, I can't digest anything on the menu.'

'Allors Monsieur, let's see... one fish meal... one phone call for the ambulance... that'll be 79,70.'

"Careful, I'm spilling your shrimp bisque all over the place."

Special - Day Old Cones

'Do you have a royalty card?'

Barry devises a way to get two lunches.

'How many times did I tell you 'Don't eat the free samples given out on the street!'?'

"A tip?... Yes, I'll give you a tip. Never eat here, the service is terrible!"

'Not only our fishcakes, Granny Cora herself was recalled. She's not really a Granny.'

"It's horrible. Well, I share my food...on social media."