Food Standards Fan Pillows

'The regulations don't allow half milk half water...but you're OK with 51%-49%.'

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"Number 2. Step forward please."

'Bunfight at the O.K corral.'

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

'Is it organic?'

"Maybe the pie chart should have been refrigerated."

Mitch Lee, kung-fondue master.

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

'This tuna is being recalled. It contains seahorse.'

This must be the address where Joe and Maureen are throwing the dinner party!

'I wasn't going to eat him, but then he tripped right in front of me.'

"Welcome to the Bermudez family Christmas party!"

'If I had to kill to survive I'd become a vegetarian.'

The Cud Food Guide

"Dad, that's horrible! I'm not trying to roast them: I'm studying them for a school project. . ."

'MILK FIGHT!'

'He has been asked to review a new dog treat ... '

'Couldn't Jack Spratt eat polyunsaturated fat?'

Pelican with wheels on it's beak.

Cull people who think, because it's organic, they can sell produce that's past its best.

'The food inspector, Sir!'

"Skunk! How is it?"

Warming hands over soup.

'The good news is we can still get abortions.'

"A Mister 'Ty Gurr' wants to reserve a table next to our fattest customer."

'Oh, oh, Mom's on a rampage again!'

Yesterday of Minnesota.

Food Fight At The O.K. Buffet.

G8 ministers agonise over food decisions.

"What do you mean 'What's for lunch'? You're a bee eater!"

101 Placenta Recipes

'I'll have the Wildebeest.'